Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Random Aging of the Creepy...

Now seems like a time when we could all use a little joy...
...but just a bit of joy. Absolutely not ULTRA-joy, that would be far too much, "non-ultra" is more like it.

Speaking of joy, autumn is here! Let's take a moment to reminisce about some of the creepy monkeys who have graced this blog. (Yes, I was going to link to the post each one appeared in, but that is hard work, and were you really going to do all of that clicking anyway?) They typically grace the pages of my coupon circular in the fall, no doubt in anticipation of my October birthday. Without further ado, and in no particular order... 
Little LuLu with her real mohair and terrifying poseable limbs
TuTu Cute from the Cuddle Toes collection...swoon
Oh, that hand-applied hair
Balika, most definitely not a toy
Eloise...amazingly real...if E.T. and a chimp mated
Fiona, back off a little. Frankie is  just not that into you
I'll give you a second to pull yourself together. Have a piece of candy to calm yourself if you need it...
What's the real reason we had to revisit all of those past creepy monkeys? I guess I was just feeling nostalgic...you know thinking back to when they were babies, possibly considering my own age and reluctance to grow up. And why was I feeling those wisps, like the hand applied hair on a baby creepy monkey? Perhaps it is because I was minding my own business on Sunday, just looking for a Cheerios coupon when my eyes were assaulted by...
This awkward teen monkey may have the "fastest bananas in the west", but no, just no.

Friday, September 23, 2016

Fri 'do

Today's question? How do we feel about my bangs?
You mean that you think you have them at all?
I am referring to the windswept, carefree wisps moving off to the left there, as opposed to the wayward Alfalfa sprouting up on the right. I mean, obviously I can carry off either look, but wanted to clarify.

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Random tid-bits

Most of the photos on my phone are of Fozzie this week. However, since he took over my Tuesday space last week, (there was some Wednesday random) he is not invited today.
How rude!
So let's see what else we have...
Oh those cartoon ladies at the movies and their troubles. I believe the claim is for "everything in between". I'd like to dispute that, but not re-enact it.

I feel like such a poser when I wear yoga pants for the simple reason that I am never doing yoga at the time. Imagine my relief when I saw this new category of clothing...
...for the leisurely athlete! The comfort of workout clothes without any pressure to actually exercise.

The coupon section can't always be about creepy monkeys. The terror has to be shared amongst other categories. Just leave his freakishly widespread eyebrows alone and focus on the message of this one.
This figurine can make your dreams come true - just like having your own actual grandson would. My husband and I spent actual minutes when he was leaving for work trying to decipher the intended meaning of the message on the left and THAT is what we came up with. On the right, I was alerted to the possibility that my mother might actually be using words like "dashing and debonair" to describe my son. Then I recalled the photo he sent me the other night while he was eating dinner...
...he found something almost as redundant as putting stuffing on a sandwich. My prince.

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Reclaimed random

If you were here yesterday, you'll be happy to know that Foz was running around like a happy lunatic earlier today. Don't worry, he quickly saw the error of his ways and got back to his business of brooding and sulking. And now,  perhaps, we can get back to the random...

You can get a vibe about a company from their publicity materials, and you can tell how important the door-to-door salesperson is based on the line they gave him to write his name on.
Clearly Terminex has great attention to detail, specifically to the three actual words printed on the card. Two out of three ain't bad, right?

Just a toad, hanging out, admiring his shadow.

Cheese is appetizing with all of its gooey splendor! Crumbly, sharp, or any other number of words. But this?
 "Liquid Gold"? Ew. (Don't get me wrong, I still cut that coupon.)

Speaking of ew, am I supposed to believe that the King is an expert at dabbling in food fusion?
 "Whopperito"? Vomarrhea!

Pumpkin Spice, stop trying to fit in everywhere!

New age water? Is that from new age faucets?
And is the bottled versus boxed tea distinction really necessary? Does the coffee aisle say "bagged tea" even though it actually comes in a box? I thought the new age thing was so funny and unique to the store I was at, until I saw this at a different store...
...so there is a whole line of new aged beverages? I feel so old!

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

He interrupts this random...

Foz, this is not your day!

You can say that again!

No, I mean this is not your day, as in, scram!

I refuse to wait any longer to air my grievance.

You have a complaint? How unusual, but you look so nice after your trip to the...

Well, need I remind you of what you looked like before you went?
Go ahead, laugh it up, but I demand some sympathy. I heard HER side of the story, but you have to listen to mine.

Go on...

Well, I had been patiently allowing the groomer to touch my gorgeous coat. She was using her fancy buzzer machine, and we were both trying not to look at each other as she approached my backside. The whole thing was getting rather exhausting...for me. I tried to convey how tired I was as best I could, but then decided to just sit down - on the buzzing thing. My parts! My blood!

Ok, while your side of the story does add a new level of pathetic to the ordeal, The groomer said it was no big deal.

Well of course, not for HER! It was MY manhood that suffered.

Foz, you are afraid of everything and I am not sure you had any manhood going into that appointment.

Way to hit me when I'm down. I'll just be here waiting for sympathy.

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

All is not Fair in love* and Random

* I really have nothing to say about love for this particular post, but am seriously running low on random blog titles.

I am pretty low on sleep these days, but luckily there is nervous energy to keep me awake and moving. Nothing in particular, just a steady hum. It is back to school eve, and my daughter starts her junior year tomorrow. Seems to me that junior year can also be called the "you can't pretend it's not happening" year. Maybe there is some comfort in calling things as they are...
...whether appealing or not? This product name seems sad for cheese, but perhaps well suited for a less than reputable online dating site.

Let's move on to the Fair! This year's sand sculpture was a tribute to the grandstand (that they tore down) and saluted acts that appeared there over the years. I may not be a Belieber, but could not believe someone destroyed such work! It is too late now to say "sorry".

The boy came home from school to reach for the food goals he read about earlier in the summer. First stop was the bacon dipped in chocolate and rolled in Butterfinger. He said it was good, and I took his word for it.

I did share my maple cotton candy...

This was the main event though...
Got all that?! Here it is in real life...
Each part was delicious, but putting everything between the bread and calling it a sandwich was a bit of a miss. Plus, there was no picking it up to enjoy. It might have worked better on a plate with a knife, fork and gravy!

I have no photo of the Twinx because I could not bring myself to order it - a bacon wrapped Twix shoved into a Twinkie that then was deep fried. Truth be told? Minus the bacon, I might have been in.

Well, that was a lot to digest, so I am going to go grab a glass of water and check back in with you in a few days.