Thursday, December 14, 2017


It's been a minute, hasn't it? October ended just in time, as it was growing more and more unappealing. November stared off promising like a lot of rebound relationships, until it became clear that it was truly not much more enticing. Luckily Thanksgiving arrived just in time to help get me grounded with a belly full of stuffing and a heart full of gratitude. So now what? What fascinating things do I have to report after this hiatus?

Let me be the first to welcome you to December! What's that you say? We're fourteen days in, and I am a little late? I see your point, but having just digested my latkes, weathered our first snow day, and started to wrap presents to put on that vacant tree skirt, I am finally ready to admit that December really is here. One would think that this sight alone would have brought me here sooner...
...but I did not know exactly what to say, and still don't. I suppose there are worse, and far more scarring, things a person could wear... eyes...MY EYES!!!!! Now this feels awkward and I really don't know what to say. I think I will just head back over to amazon...but I do still like it here, so hopefully I make it back sooner!

Thursday, November 9, 2017

Throwback Thursday... the random post I meant to write Tuesday!

There were other things going on involving my computer on Tuesday. Nothing major, just COLLEGE APPLICATION ESSAY REVIEW! Did I say that out loud? I was not actually involved in the process that evening, just my computer was. Yes, there is another computer in the house, but that one cannot be reached from the couch, where I was being held captive by a very persuasive cushion. My husband was the chosen editor in chief, and I pretended that was not the least bit offensive. Little did I know that she was just waiting to ask for my assistance with the big push...last review...and actually hitting the submit button.
(Yes, we had to get off the couch for this as Chrome wasn't allowing her to actually submit.)
So I guess now I will get back to the random so it doesn't pile up on me! 

Can't I just eat my Halloween candy in peace without the pressure of Christmas candy? And can't m&m's get a hold of themselves and stop trying to cram nonsense into candy shells?
You know what was missing from peanut m&m's? Nothing! Peanut brittle has a place and it is by itself in my mouth. Obviously I will succumb at some point and try these when I have deemed the holiday season to have actually begun, but I will not be happy about it. Moving on to other joy filled food...
Was the real problem with lima beans the fact that the can left their appearance a mystery? I am even less likely to buy them if I have to see them. Glory? That is a bold statement, as is premium.

I might be the only one in our house who sees anything worth noting in this advertisement...
...but I am certain the look on the golden's face is saying something along the lines of "Bitch please, I get it, you are more petite than I am. I hope a certain hell awaits you on the other side...but bring me back something...please"

Monday, November 6, 2017

Well polished memory

I've mentioned my grandmother a few times here before. I thought this one post in particular was from just a few months ago, until I had to peruse all the way back to June of last year to find it. (I also thought the photos that will appear in this post were taken less than four months ago.) Over the past year or so I guess we have learned a bit more about dementia, but I cannot honestly say I understand it any better. As my grandmother's capacity for holding memories grows smaller, the tighter I feel myself cling to the memories of her that I have - as if somehow I am keeping them for both of us. 

We sat one morning talking about nothing in particular, most likely the weather. She commented that her nails needed to be touched up. I leapt out of my seat, happy for the opportunity to feel useful, and went to look for the nail polish.
She asked me if I wore nail polish, and I answered that it had been a very long time since I had. I have many memories of my grandmother giving me some fine manicures when I was little, so I asked her if she wanted to paint my nails.
Her hand was steadier than I expected, but she mentioned that she was having some trouble seeing well. I just kept telling her they looked fine...
even if they didn't... was no worse than I would have done myself. My plan may have been to have this small moment and then quickly wipe it away with a cotton ball when I got home, but I didn't. I couldn't because looking at my nails made me smile. I had a new memory of the two of us, that tucked in so nicely with the lifetime of other memories I have of us together.

Tuesday, October 24, 2017

Pause for four paws

This  picture pretty much captures what has been responsible for keeping this blog running.

 No, this was not quite this level of running we typically operated at, despite what one of us may have wanted you to believe
 But when we did put our heads, or whatever, together, we came up with some things.
 One of us knew the best ways to look sad
 Which might have been related to the zero m&m's that were shared with him
I guess it is time to get to the point. Fozzie's heart condition seemed to be taking on some new symptoms recently, but nothing that was really taking away the essence of Foz being Foz. I called last week to schedule a vet appointment for us to check in to see if it was time to tweak anything. The appointment was scheduled for yesterday morning. Over the weekend Foz stopped eating, which meant no medicine either. No chicken, no ground beef, no eggs, no pumpkin. Water and sleep were his only interests. His eyes had changed-the vet noticed too. There were other indications that he was in distress (of course, in true Foz style they were not the three big symptoms I have been watching for). It was time...

I told him I would let you all know, and that wings would be the last costume he'd have to wear.
 Run free sweet Foz

Saturday, October 21, 2017

I can't think of a title though!

The other day I had an idea for a blog post I wanted to write. I wasn't exactly sure where on the growing list of posts I am absolutely going to accomplish it fell, but it had top five potential. I was driving of course, as that is where a lot of my ponderings happen - most likely because there are no dust bunnies clamoring for my attention like there tend to be when I am seated comfortably on the couch at home, laptop within reach. There were a few stop signs on my route, so I did a quick scan to see if there was any paper I could scribble my musings on. Nope. I considered asking Siri for some help with a reminder, but then decided I should have more confidence in myself and the worthwhile sentences coming together in my brain. I don't need to tell you how this story ends, do I? Maybe I could just update you some time WHEN THAT IDEA COMES BACK TO ME!!!!

Meanwhile I have at least three other topics doing a little pinball routine between my ears. If I write them down, or go one step further and create a post, will other long forgotten ideas come back to fill the vacated spaces? I could quickly jot some notes on that piece of paper with other posts I intended to write, but where IS that list? When I sat down just now, it was my intent to simply type, as in compose a blog post. Instead, I felt compelled to launch into this "one that got away" fish tale, but maybe there is time to turn this thing around (as apparently hitting delete is not an option for me).

Let's get ready to ramble...about fruit flies (yep, they are on the list, so now you have a glimpse at the quality of what you have to look forward to). One fruit fly is too many in my house because they are too challenging to effectively swat. That being said, I did manage to take one down that my recent nectarine purchase gifted me with. Several of the deceased's friends must have witnessed what went down and they got busy...well getting increase their numbers in the fight. I resorted to a homemade trap, that I learned how to make years ago, in hopes it would once again work its magic. I felt a bit of nostalgia.

It was probably fifteen years ago, and my then small children and I were at a playdate. I was already good enough friends with the other mom by then that fruit flies in the presence of a large bowl of fresh produce were nothing to be ashamed of. (Please note: you should never be embarrassed by actual fruit flies, instead, pat yourself on the back for trying to offer healthy snack options.) We decided the numbers were reaching a level that called for action. Sure, we were two adults with four kids between us and two functional vehicles in the driveway, so someone could have escaped to the store. I remember those days though when having another adult to talk to sitting right there next to me was worth more than a solo trip to the store for fruit fly traps. We could have loaded all of the children into one of our minivans, but I also remember those days when I would have punched someone for disturbing children who were happily playing. I also remember how many times it felt like my days did not offer as much purpose as I wanted it to feel like they had.

There was a problem - fruit flies. We were two intelligent women, one of whom has always had superior googling skills - not me. Next thing I knew, we were making fruit fly traps. Vinegar + some dishwashing liquid + water until you have a heap of bubbles on the bowl. Voila!
Gross? That seems extreme. Successful? Yes! I was so impressed with our efforts, as well as this piece of practical knowledge that I would now carry along into the future. It has been awhile since there has been an issue with such an easily accessible solution. I miss those days sometimes. Sure, things didn't always work out, like maybe I ran out of vinegar. Luckily, we had done more extensive research into other trap designs, and this works equally as well...
(That is fruit in container and there are small holes cut in plastic wrap)

Now before I can truly put this fruit fly thing to rest. (Seriously?) I have to add another little something so it doesn't try to make itself a whole separate stand alone post...

My grandmother had this really cool container to keep her homemade pies in. Now I coincidentally have this really cool container to keep homemade pies in. (I have nothing against store bought pies, but they typically come in a container already. Was that disclaimer really necessary?) Moving on, there are vents in the plastic cover so that the pie doesn't get soggy. Worked wonders for my grandmother at home and on various apple pie transporting missions. Guess what this contraption turned into at my house this fall when I started baking apple pies? Go on, you've got it...a fruit fly trap! Ugh...this could launch into another story about how things that seemed magical, or even simple, in my grandmother's hands turned slippery and impossible to hold in mine, but let's stop here for this time.

There was that girl down the hall, freshman year of college, who was a bio major and obsessed with the fruit flies in her genetics class. I have a picture of her fruit fly costume she made for Halloween that year. I think I could find it relatively quickly. NO!!!!!!!! I will end this post. I will not just save the draft while I go rifling through old photos, finding myself in a nostalgia spiral I cannot escape! Just a quick peek for typos, aaaaaaaaaand "publish"! (oh my gosh, I just realized there is no title!)

Friday, October 20, 2017

Who am I?

With all of this Halloween hoopla, I am starting to have an identity crisis! Am I the hamburglar? (Oh how I wish!)
I do tend to make a little piggy of myself, but rarely get to go to the market OR have roast beef. Alas, I am the little piggy who had none!
One thing remains unchanged though...I am a ROCKSTAR!

Friday, October 13, 2017

You Can Call me Al*

*Can I call you Betty?

Let me just get myself adjusted a little better here...
Ah - much better? 
I just don't feel like Foz is an appropriate name for my new persona. The plaid shirt and beard are very Tool Time, no? Or maybe just Jack? (Lumber implied.)

How many weeks left until November?

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

No better time than the random

Can you smell it? Something is in the air-October is here! If you've spent the past few autumns here, you know what that birthday is coming...which also tends to mean that A NEW CREEPY MONKEY WILL SHOW ITSELF!!!!! (Last year there was a bit of a recap.) Luckily the horror delight of this year's offering appeared to a dear friend of mine who lives out of town. I could have missed the opportunity to gaze upon this...
She emailed this to me with a simple message that said "I assume we are going to this". Such rage on this banana-hearted monkey's face! It almost made me feel like I had no other option than spending the $800...would he haunt my dreams forever if I didn't?! I wonder what they are serving for lunch. 

Speaking of lunch, the other day I was wondering if I would be able to tell if the waffles I had made days before were still good...
...why, yes, it was rather apparent. Any other blatantly obvious issues around here? Oh, I don't know, like plants that need to be watered?
Hm! Any odors that need to be trapped?
Hey wait, what's the problem with all of that chocolate ice cream? Graphics team, go home and think about what you've done here. Why can't you be more like these marketing folks?
Seriously, this is my new favorite product name...ever! 

I guess it is time for me to go stretch out and rest now. Hopefully a bird doesn't slam into the glass and land dead on me while I do so (at least that is my CSI theory). 

I am sorry for sharing that one (kind of), but seriously, can you even believe my magnetism for such random? 

Friday, October 6, 2017

Walking where?

People around here seem really happy that October has arrived. I too am looking forward to some cooler weather, and crunchy leaves under my feet (now that the initial fear has passed). Then I remembered what one person in particular REALLY likes to do when Halloween is in sight. 

If you are new here, or just have a poor memory, here is my post from two years ago. Go ahead, I'll wait...Last year I decided to put my distaste into song. Take your time, the couch isn't going anywhere. I tapped back into my lyrical genius again this year, and I am certainly not walking in a Winter Wonderland!

Plastic bags crinkle
Are you listenin'?
So much fabric
Some of it glistens
A horrible sight
I am full of fright

This whole situation's out of hand!

Many costumes
Like a whole bunch!
Now I'm hungry
How about lunch?
These plans that you've made
Make me so afraid

This whole situation's out of hand!

We could build a fort out of Milkbones
And for shingles we could use some cheese
If I pretend I actually like it
Maybe this whole thing will be a breeze

I've been Vader 
And a cowboy
A peacock, a lobster
And what now joy?

Oh no, what the cluck!
I'm all out of luck!

This whole situation's out of hand!

Tuesday, October 3, 2017

Quick random story

So much, there is just so much going on. I can't find the words to do justice to any of the topics flashing by weekly...daily. Instead I am offering this simple story -

It was Dolphy Day at LeMoyne College in the spring of 1990. No classes would be attended, replaced instead with "beverages" and music outside all day long. The opening chords of Free Fallin' came out of the speakers. My roommate and I waited patiently for the first chorus, then started singing our hearts out - as one does. This friend of ours said "Who sings this song?" I remember thinking he was a complete dolt for having to ask, as I answered "Tom Petty". His response? "Let's keep it that way." 

Friday, September 29, 2017


Clearly you have something to say, Foz, but I am not exactly sure what. Your laptop is dead? You can't reach the mouse? You are too lazy to move your head and open the computer?


Sunday, September 24, 2017

Friday, September 22, 2017

Things are heating up!

Every dog must have his day, and mine is Friday...every Friday...all day long! 

Apparently I am living with vampires here as they try their best to block out the sun.
They cannot steal my sunshine though. I can absolutely read a calendar, and know that autumn is upon us, so why on earth does it feel like the dog days of summer? Maybe I should untangle myself and just close these curtains a little bit.

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Really quick random

I just wanted to stop in quickly before I collect my big winnings...
 ...I am sure I am not too late, right? I can think of no more legitimate sweepstakes notification! Now don't you try to print out this "form" to fill in as your own. I will not forget any of you, and will continue to blog - perhaps on a better computer? Or maybe I will pay someone else to blog, better than I do, as my gift to all ten of you. However, for now, it's still just me! Do you see what I see?
This cloud made me laugh with its little eyes and great big lips! You know what else makes me happy? Inchworms!
But not when they are being dragged into a dark alley by a wasp!! I am off to try to figure out how I am going to ration these successfully until I get around to replenishing!

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Not taking no for an answer

Apparently Foz never got the memo about my decision to go in another direction with my superhero sidekick search.
He does wear his blanket well as a cape, but I still have my doubts regarding his bravery for this role.

Friday, September 15, 2017

One of us thinks it's funny

Oh, hey, Foz! Do you like video games?

Is that a jab at my lack of thumbs?
No, I was just wondering if you'd ever heard of Space Invaders?

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Random things*

*I started to agonize over a title, something that would bring the whole post together. I then realized I was not only procrastinating, but missing the whole point of random!

Nothing adds insult to injury during an 8:00 a.m. Walmart run quite like these creepy monkeys.

So if I told you we saw a HUGE spider out at camp on Labor Day, you might be left to wonder just how large that spider was, and in relation to what other spiders I have seen. Or maybe you might think I was procrastinating. Here, see for yourself! 

Let this serve as a warning to any other hornets planning to build their nests in our grill: we cook food on there, and that requires heat...heat that will scorch your wings and leave you wandering around complaining to each other.

Looking for a new hobby? Have you considered metal working?
 Really cool shapes, aren't they? This is a good thing since we now have matching shapes burnt into our kitchen floor!
I just regret that the medium we used was the pan I use EVERY night to make some part of dinner.