Friday, September 23, 2016

Fri 'do

Today's question? How do we feel about my bangs?
You mean that you think you have them at all?
I am referring to the windswept, carefree wisps moving off to the left there, as opposed to the wayward Alfalfa sprouting up on the right. I mean, obviously I can carry off either look, but wanted to clarify.

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Random tid-bits

Most of the photos on my phone are of Fozzie this week. However, since he took over my Tuesday space last week, (there was some Wednesday random) he is not invited today.
How rude!
So let's see what else we have...
Oh those cartoon ladies at the movies and their troubles. I believe the claim is for "everything in between". I'd like to dispute that, but not re-enact it.

I feel like such a poser when I wear yoga pants for the simple reason that I am never doing yoga at the time. Imagine my relief when I saw this new category of clothing...
...for the leisurely athlete! The comfort of workout clothes without any pressure to actually exercise.

The coupon section can't always be about creepy monkeys. The terror has to be shared amongst other categories. Just leave his freakishly widespread eyebrows alone and focus on the message of this one.
This figurine can make your dreams come true - just like having your own actual grandson would. My husband and I spent actual minutes when he was leaving for work trying to decipher the intended meaning of the message on the left and THAT is what we came up with. On the right, I was alerted to the possibility that my mother might actually be using words like "dashing and debonair" to describe my son. Then I recalled the photo he sent me the other night while he was eating dinner...
...he found something almost as redundant as putting stuffing on a sandwich. My prince.

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Reclaimed random

If you were here yesterday, you'll be happy to know that Foz was running around like a happy lunatic earlier today. Don't worry, he quickly saw the error of his ways and got back to his business of brooding and sulking. And now,  perhaps, we can get back to the random...

You can get a vibe about a company from their publicity materials, and you can tell how important the door-to-door salesperson is based on the line they gave him to write his name on.
Clearly Terminex has great attention to detail, specifically to the three actual words printed on the card. Two out of three ain't bad, right?

Just a toad, hanging out, admiring his shadow.

Cheese is appetizing with all of its gooey splendor! Crumbly, sharp, or any other number of words. But this?
 "Liquid Gold"? Ew. (Don't get me wrong, I still cut that coupon.)

Speaking of ew, am I supposed to believe that the King is an expert at dabbling in food fusion?
 "Whopperito"? Vomarrhea!

Pumpkin Spice, stop trying to fit in everywhere!

New age water? Is that from new age faucets?
And is the bottled versus boxed tea distinction really necessary? Does the coffee aisle say "bagged tea" even though it actually comes in a box? I thought the new age thing was so funny and unique to the store I was at, until I saw this at a different store... there is a whole line of new aged beverages? I feel so old!

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

He interrupts this random...

Foz, this is not your day!

You can say that again!

No, I mean this is not your day, as in, scram!

I refuse to wait any longer to air my grievance.

You have a complaint? How unusual, but you look so nice after your trip to the...

Well, need I remind you of what you looked like before you went?
Go ahead, laugh it up, but I demand some sympathy. I heard HER side of the story, but you have to listen to mine.

Go on...

Well, I had been patiently allowing the groomer to touch my gorgeous coat. She was using her fancy buzzer machine, and we were both trying not to look at each other as she approached my backside. The whole thing was getting rather exhausting...for me. I tried to convey how tired I was as best I could, but then decided to just sit down - on the buzzing thing. My parts! My blood!

Ok, while your side of the story does add a new level of pathetic to the ordeal, The groomer said it was no big deal.

Well of course, not for HER! It was MY manhood that suffered.

Foz, you are afraid of everything and I am not sure you had any manhood going into that appointment.

Way to hit me when I'm down. I'll just be here waiting for sympathy.

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

All is not Fair in love* and Random

* I really have nothing to say about love for this particular post, but am seriously running low on random blog titles.

I am pretty low on sleep these days, but luckily there is nervous energy to keep me awake and moving. Nothing in particular, just a steady hum. It is back to school eve, and my daughter starts her junior year tomorrow. Seems to me that junior year can also be called the "you can't pretend it's not happening" year. Maybe there is some comfort in calling things as they are...
...whether appealing or not? This product name seems sad for cheese, but perhaps well suited for a less than reputable online dating site.

Let's move on to the Fair! This year's sand sculpture was a tribute to the grandstand (that they tore down) and saluted acts that appeared there over the years. I may not be a Belieber, but could not believe someone destroyed such work! It is too late now to say "sorry".

The boy came home from school to reach for the food goals he read about earlier in the summer. First stop was the bacon dipped in chocolate and rolled in Butterfinger. He said it was good, and I took his word for it.

I did share my maple cotton candy...

This was the main event though...
Got all that?! Here it is in real life...
Each part was delicious, but putting everything between the bread and calling it a sandwich was a bit of a miss. Plus, there was no picking it up to enjoy. It might have worked better on a plate with a knife, fork and gravy!

I have no photo of the Twinx because I could not bring myself to order it - a bacon wrapped Twix shoved into a Twinkie that then was deep fried. Truth be told? Minus the bacon, I might have been in.

Well, that was a lot to digest, so I am going to go grab a glass of water and check back in with you in a few days.

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Continuing with the RaNdOm

Oh, hey! Thanks for stopping by, let's see what I can offer you from the photos on my phone this week...

I found this telephone and sign to be such a funny thing, but am having a hard time putting into words exactly why. Of course, that is not going to stop me from trying! Friends at the one-day surgery center, back off, as this is a family matter...
It also may not be for you, so don't make things awkward. Was nobody answering the phone before the sign went up because permission had not been formally granted? Don't just look around at the corners of the room, not making eye contact, because you don't want to hog the thrill of picking up that funky fun phone. Remember though, to only answer it "if it rings". And what if THE CALL IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE?!?!? And now I have the Wonder Pets theme song in my head!

I do not know what the hell happened to the sale price tagger in Target this past weekend causing him/her (seriously, do we have to debate which gender would leave this mess) to flee the scene, leaving it in such disarray...
"Can't. Take. Pressure. Too. Many. Signs." Maybe that employee should have grabbed a Snickers, from right there in the snack aisle, to tame the hunger issue?

Lower your expectations on this option though...

The Reese's Pieces Big Cup. Do you already see some slight disappointment in that photo? Yes, it was delicious, as far as a Reese's peanut butter cup goes, but I needed MORE! I had been hiding this package in my sock drawer for back to school time, and instead of an uplifting party in my mouth with mini Reese's pieces guests, I got shell fragments.

Speaking of snacks, please stop trying to make watermelons out to be a personal serving kind of thing.

Friday, August 26, 2016

Makes no mistake

National Dog Day you say? So how many wishes does that mean I get?
I'm not sure if it works like that, Foz.

Hot fudge sundaes?

Well, you did get some rice with your dinner.

So you are telling me that there is a national day to celebrate me...

...And other dogs...

Whatever. And you think some lukewarm rice counts as festivities?

You did eat it.

True. So, at the very least, can you stop referring to my pooping near that pile of stuff my boy had packed for school as an "accident"? I assure you, that was exactly what I meant to do!

It's a deal, Foz.