Whatever happened to Tuesdays? I mean I know they've still been happening, but it's not like there's been a shortage of random to bring here, but these lines weren't just going to vacuum themselves!
I might do that to give the illusion that the house is clean. I am not exactly sure if it works since not many people come over, but I seem to be falling for it. I mean, I also have been kind of busy making fruit fly traps...
...sorry, I didn't mean to be all braggy and showy about my success. Make no mistake, there are still some lurking around here. That's one of the many mysteries of the drosophila melanogaster (thanks google). The short life span, but the rapid reproduction rate sure do enable these pests to linger far longer than it seems necessary. My apparent fascination with this topic is only thirty-three years too late! There was a bio major on our floor freshman year and she was obsessed with her fruit flies, so much so that her Halloween costume celebrated her love of her lab friends.
See her down there on the right? I do not recall why most of us were flipping the bird, but I suspect it had something to do with just figuring we were all that. Do you see me? (Look for the highest bird.)
Okay, here is another mystery I am guessing you've been faced with as well.
Why is the roll replacement task too much for my kids? Was that an actual skill I was supposed to demonstrate for them? I walked from that bathroom to the next one where I saw this.
This was my husband putting the towels away? Wait, that is the wrong description for the job he did. He brought the towels upstairs. The stack on the right goes under the towel under the basket. (And those are HIS towels, so I like to think he knows where he takes them from.) The stack on the left goes in the empty roll bathroom. Basically, zero towels go where he put them. At least I get more steps in walking things back where they belong, and speaking of exercise...
...can you figure out the options for exercise level on this questionnaire my daughter had to complete as a new patient? The choices are "no exercise" or triathlete?! That box for "other" is a little daunting, don't you think? Plenty of room to try to explain or justify the fitness regime! Jazzercise? Rollerskating? Speaking of...
...I was at a complete loss for what these were, and then once I scrolled down far enough, I was baffled as to WHYYYYYYYYY. I didn't even know people were back to wearing roller skates (as opposed to roller blades). As long as we are asking ourselves the question...
WHY?! Why do I need more sugar with my cereal or cereal crumbs messing with what I supposed to chocolatey delight!?
WHY? Why are potato chips trying to taste like other chips? You are enough potato chips, don't try to be somebody else. And WHY did I buy them? Why do we always have to know? Ummmm, maybe we dn't always have to know...
WHY? Nope.
WHY? Why did the powers that be think this was an appetizing look for a burrito? It looks to me like somebody put Cinnamon Toast Crunch in it. I can not unsee it and therefore do not want to eat it! We need something more appetizing to look at now...
...sometimes you wanna feel fancy, so you make fondue, and other times...
...you just want to amuse yourself by making a white trash sampler platter.
Well that seems like enough for us to ponder for now, so I'll leave you with these parting words in the letter from my retiring gynecologist...
...ew.
Roller skating is a thing now. Roller blading is not a thing now, although it was a thing for a long time and some roller bladers are probably still blading around. I know because I spoke to a very nice young woman named Elissa who was out skating in my neighborhood. She explained it to me. They want to roller skate the way people used to do.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
This is excellent reporting, Janie! Now just a little more field work to let us know if you have seen those stoppers out in the wild!?
DeleteWhen you said kid's bathroom, I was sure you were going to say that your husband left the t.p. on the counter. That's what mine does and I don't even have a 'difficult' holder to navigate; the toilet paper just slides onto the holder. Did his mother fail him or did I? Random thought...
ReplyDeleteIt's like we just have a tp fairy who is way too busy to deal with roll holder mechanics!
DeleteSo. Many. Things. My ADHD radar is going off.
ReplyDeleteThis is when I wish I could record o a podcast of all of this fun stuff. I might steal a few of these for ideas, if you don't mind. I will credit you, of course.
I am jealous of your carpet and of the vacuum lines.
My children do the same thing with the toilet paper.
Those $40 rollerskate toes are what we call a want, not a necessity. I do, however, have a secret desire to be a roller derby chick.
Those food things are not at all appealing. I'm not into any of the current food fads. It makes me wonder if I'm the problem. :)
Can I just come on the podcast?!?!?!?! Feel free to dress up any topics as you see fit ;)
ReplyDeleteI saw those Kit Kats at Wal-Mart and was tempted. Just because.
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