* "The Contest"? Is that what we are really calling this?
It's Friday again, so that means it is time for Marianne and I to each post another letter. This correspondence was one of the first ten that I wrote, a part of the bursting-with-passion-love-letter series, if you will! Let's see if that exuberance paid off, or just scared folks away like the unrequited loves of my early teenage years.
Dear
Nabisco:
S’mores
aren’t just for campfires here at our house. We have perfected the microwave
technique, and when a troop of eleven Girl Scouts was eagerly awaiting
snacktime at my kitchen table, the oven and some cookie sheets proved
invaluable. I have really only found one way to screw up a s’more, and that
would be pulling graham crackers out of anything other than a navy blue
Honey-Maid box. Recently I was standing outside at a friend’s house, with my
marshmallow stick dancing carefully near a flame, when I heard teenage voices
saying “these graham crackers taste stale or something”. I smugly asked if they
were Honey-Maid, knowing full well what the answer would be as I popped the
toasted marshmallow into my mouth and just ate the chocolate on the side. No
Nabisco, no s’more for this cracker snob. (Please note: I would have eaten the
Nabisco red box variety, but the blue is by far my favorite.)
I
was not a big fan of sweets when I was younger, a late bloomer of sorts. One of
my favorite after dinner treats was a graham cracker dunked in milk. The trick
was getting the cracker just soaked enough to be mushy, but without breaking
and falling in. Only Honey-Maid had just the right crunch to be paired with the
soggy side and superior flavor. If I pass our kitchen pantry on my way to sit
down, I still grab that glass of milk, but if I am just wandering by the snack
shelves on my way to do something else, I just grab some graham crackers to eat
plain on the way. Or, if I am getting out staples for dinner, I might grab a
rectangle, or maybe if I have the pantry door open to look at the calendar, I
eat some, or maybe if the potato chips I ate weren’t quite what I wanted
afterall, I will grab a quick square. I am always so relieved that two full
rectangles is a serving size. That can be broken down into sixteen smaller
rectangles to be spread out over the course of an afternoon. Who am I kidding?
It is more a matter of my finding that two servings seems acceptable as I
realize that eight broken halves adds up to more than two full crackers.
Years
ago, when my son was a baby about to be introduced to solid food, of course I
had Cheerios on the brain (and in my pockets and all over the floor). However,
the second item on the list that the pediatrician rattled off was graham
crackers. (I am sure the “blue box only” was implied.) I may be the only one
around here who still has hankerings for plain Cheerios, but the graham cracker
crumb trails could be from any one of the four of us. My husband is a big fan
of the cinnamon variety, and after over eighteen years of marriage and two
teenagers, he has learned that using the word “bargain” in a sentence with
graham crackers that are not Honey-Maid will not impress anyone here.
On
another note, some people might think you can cheat on your graham crackers
when making a crust. Why don’t they realize they just end up with crummy
crumbs? I would like to thank you for saving me the trouble of sacrificing my
snacks, and having to get out the food processor, by having that blue box of
graham cracker crumbs just waiting for me in the baking aisle. I also
appreciate the larger sized blue box of graham crackers that you have made
available, as it gives me a much greater sense of security that we will not run
out before my next trip to the grocery store.
A
graham cracker by any other name really isn’t the same, unless that name is
“dram crapper” as spoken by my son’s four-year-old friend many years ago.
Happily
dunking,
Andrea
Casarsa
The result? I did find an envelope in my mailbox! While the form letter style may have masked any strong feelings Mondelez International has for me, they did include a coupon for a free nabisco product. 5 POINTS!
Dammit. And she makes it close! Where are my stamps???
ReplyDeletelosers
ReplyDeleteThere was definitely a lot of love shown there. Might I say gushing? Like the chocolate and marshmallow escaping from between your heralded graham crackers? Or is that oozing?
ReplyDeleteSuccess with graham crackers! Try Mercedes-Benz next...see if you get anything!!
ReplyDelete-andi
Hahaha congrats. You've even made me want smores, and I'm not supposed to want sweet things any more. :-D
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA Success!!! You know I've never had a smore? I was never around any campfires....because I don't camp. I didn't grow up in a family that was big on the great outdoors.
ReplyDeleteThat's a great letter. For years, I had graham cracker and chocolate milk for breakfast every morning. About four years ago I gave up the graham crackers. What in the heck was I thinking? I'm happy for your five points.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
Woohoo! Victory tastes like s'mores!
ReplyDeleteI used to eat my grammies dunked in milk too!!!
ReplyDeleteOh the memories.
You should have gotten ten free coupons.
I am gonna email them to complain!
Oh wait......
I need to start writing these companies. :D What's the best loyalty reward you've received so far??????
ReplyDelete1. Dang, girl; you is in LUUUUUUURVE with that navy blue box!
ReplyDelete2. After that passionate note, they should've shipped a case of the stuff over to you, STAT.
3. I now feel compelled to go buy these graham crackers and a jar of Nutella. Thanks a lot, Andrea.
;-)
A box by any other name... :D
ReplyDeleteOnce again, I am regretting not doing more letter writing!!!
You guys are so funny! You deserved boxes!
ReplyDelete