A soon-to-be-named Friday series

When I started blogging in 2010, my family was excited relieved that I finally had a new set of ears and eyes with whom to share my overactive imagination.  For the first couple of years, the kids mocked my number of followers (five) and struggled to distinguish between imaginary blog friends and the actual human beings who shared extended lunches with me at Panera.

I remember being confused about how to grow relationships with people who had provided such incredible and entertaining glimpses into their worlds. Actual email addresses were as valuable to me as celebrity autographs. Finally, a shared appreciation for a good poop joke pushed me to take the giant step of asking a blogger for her actual address. Marianne, of We Band of Mothers fame, was to be the recipient of some juvenile item I couldn't resist purchasing. Don't ask her about it, because she won't remember.  She also might be operating under the assumption that we are related, so let's just run with that, shall we?

I am one of those people who is constantly in the middle of an organizational project.  It is my way of creating order when life feels out of control, (hence the "constantly"). As the school year drew to a close last spring, I sought refuge with Marianne, my Fairy Blogmother, to help find a more exciting use for my nervous energy. She did not disappoint, and I was thrilled when I realized she was not pointing to the girl next to me.  She overlooked my explanations as to why I was a poor choice of co-conspirators, and we got to work.

1. The rules

We would each select one of our favorite products, on a weekly basis, and write a letter to the company.  The letter had to be funny and ask for nothing in return.  We had to truly use and enjoy the product we were writing about.  Yet every response was given a point value.

If the company called or sent a letter = 1 point

If the company sent a coupon = 2 points

If the company sent actual product, voucher for product, or gift card = 5 points 

Let me tell you, we looked forward to checking our mailboxes with the passion of a thousand suburban moms with too much time on their hands.  We were STOKED.

2.  The outcome

Each week, starting next Friday, Marianne and I will post our letters, the results, and our current point totals.  You will be amazed and dazzled by the outright lunacy displayed in scoring $1.00 off coupons.

And more.

SO much more.

So please stay tuned, place your wagers, and find out who is THE ULTIMATE PATRONIZER.