Sunday, June 9, 2013

Seasons change

I didn't see it on the calendar, and I didn't feel it in the shifting breeze, yet even when not consciously aware, I knew change was coming. The confirmation was that urge to organize. I started to restlessly wander around the kitchen, looking for something that needed to be tackled. I normally try to restore order to my universe as a reaction to change, but the modifications this time around may be grand enough for me to attempt a jumpstart with my coping. Something about living with a thirteen year old girl, and being mere weeks away from living with a sixteen year old boy feels like standing on the edge of some sort of point of no return. 

This is the first June that I hold fewer delusions of what the summer will have in store. A couple of years ago, I had the kids operating the vacuum cleaner the first day of summer break, and they never touched it again. There have been other ambitious tries at reading challenges, journal writing and general attempts at making what seems to be good productive use of our/their time. As I catch glimpses of those cherubs, who are both now taller than I am, doing their best to get the couch cushions molded to fit them just right, I realize I should probably get used to that view.

My first thought was that "operation remove clutter" might be the one thing able to distract me from the stress-induced chocolate fandango I had been partaking in. The next thought that came to me was that my house looked suspiciously pulled together...almost as if it hadn't been so long ago when I sought to get life under my control. It's possible. Perhaps I just grew weary of being unable to find our kitchen counter, and denying that the stuff strewn across every other horizontal surface didn't have a home. It's possible.

I peered in a few cupboards to make sure this was, in fact, my home. Crammed with what-not? Yep, this is my domain. I had my work cut out for me, but quickly realized that I was not interested in shuffling the same old stuff. One quick glance revealed that I was going to be faced with the remnants of my last purge. Unless I was ready to admit that there were too many tubes of hand lotion or that it was time to get rid of the excessive number of refrigerator magnets that sought refuge in a basket during numerous rounds of making the refrigerator less chaotic for company, there just wasn't anything obvious left to trash. How boring. 

I started to consider whether a significant change called for some sort of more significant retaliation. So today I mopped the floor. Trust me, that was new and different. It was satisfying for the five minutes before new flotsam landed on it. In between some puttering outside, I read a book today...a whole book. At some point I also warded off a sneaking suspicion that exercise would probably be beneficial on more than one level. Make no mistake, I have plenty of things I could and should be working on. I am thinking of making a wheel of choices, not only as a possible means of procrastination distraction progress, but because I think the idea of starting every day in a game show kind of way would be exciting. 

7 comments:

  1. I can relate to so much in this post. You're standing on the edge of 13 and 16. I'm on the edge of a nest that is/will be now more empty than full - ages 18 and 20, and I hope I can find some place to settle in that land of unknown.

    As for the clutter - oy. I have a whole house that needs attention, and it is one of my plans upon return to use this summer for, among other things, tackling the 'inner chaos' that has become by closets, drawers, cabinets and basement. Oh the basement - it gives me the twitches to even think about right now.

    Hope you have a productive week!! :)

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  2. Sounds like your about to get really productive

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  3. I have one who will be sixteen on July 7th. She's still in bed asleep and hasn't made it down to the sofa yet. :/


    I want one of those wheels. It reminds me of the Family Fun Jar during Christmas vacation *big evil grin*

    When the wheel is up and functional, please share. Then I'll copy yours/make one and I'll yell upstairs early in the morning, COME ON DOWN!!! It's Your Turn on the Big Wheel!!!

    xo,
    RJ

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  4. "Spin The Wheel" sounds like a fun way to do chores but I know myself too well. If it lands on something I hate to do, like cleaning the oven I'll cheat and re-spin it!

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  5. Why does adulthood consist of cleaning and tidying up all the time?
    I don't need a wheel, I need a bulldozer! Or maybe I just need to find my child somewhere else to live. :)

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  6. I know something you can work on...ahem...for Friday....

    As far as the point of no return, that sounds like my saggy stomach. Only surgery will fix that sucker now.

    Hang in there. And no cleaning floors.

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