Thursday, November 3, 2011

Battle line drawn

Another installment of why I should be getting my Mother of the Year Award any week now played out this morning. I had been waging a not-so-secret war against my daughter's outfit selections since school started. I have no one to blame but myself if she doesn't wear something that I grabbed on a bargain hunt outing, or anything that I just thought might be cute. However, when she is pulling stuff out of her hamper instead of wearing perfectly good (and clean) items from her closet that she picked out, I get irritated.

I tried to grab some items during the return period, but she claimed she was most definitely going to wear them. Not happening. I just kept doing the laundry every Monday, and would then see her wearing the same select shirts over and over. This week I decided that I would do the laundry, but not put any of the freshly cleaned shirts back in her closet. There are so many choices in there, I wanted to see how long it would really take for her to "not find anything to wear". Of course it was no secret that I was doing laundry, as clean bottoms were appearing (as in the same black, dark gray, and black yoga pants that have become the sixth grade dress code). The shirts were all being stacked in the guest room. Yesterday was the first day I saw a shirt not in the usual rotation, granted it was a favorite a couple of months ago, so we still weren't wearing the "new" stuff.

I had laid back down this morning after waking her up, in an attempt to pretend that the day wasn't really starting, even though I had been up over an hour. My body was just rejecting its time on the elliptical and I was trying to make peace with it. Suddenly, the girl was at my bedroom door. I said "hello", and she just kept walking closer. I started to get concerned about what she was going to tell me that couldn't be broadcast across the room. When she got about two feet from me, she looked me in the eye and said, "You've been hiding my clothes." I made a lame effort to play dumb, "You have clean pants?" She inquired about her shirts and I told her I saw several in her closet. She informed me that she had worn something different yesterday (at least she wasn't playing dumb about what was going on) and wanted the purple Nike long sleeved shirt. I tried to send her for any number of other long sleeved shirts, but she said that one was comfy and it was a gym day. How could I argue with gym day?

I told her she had to stay put as to not know where my hiding place was. I tried to make noise in a variety of places before bringing her the purple shirt. For some reason it seems important to note that this is some random shirt that I purchased for myself, only to realize that human sausage was not the look I was going for. Normally she pooh-poohs anything that comes out of the mother's closet, but not this. In fact, just the other day she asked where it was purchased because she wanted more just like it.

Am I being foolish for fighting this battle? Sure, maybe a little. I think she's being crazy too though, and this morning I think she saw that she has competition in the totally unreasonable department!

11 comments:

  1. This is not a battle that you will win, I fear. Girls are notoriously stubborn about this stuff. Her peers, however, may be able to help you. They will eventually notice her consistent wardrobe and will take care of it for you.

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  2. I hate when I buy new clothes (bargains of COURSE), that they approve, but when it comes time to wear them, for some reason they never get worn!!! UGH Had that battle with Evan this morning and he walked out without saying goodbye. sigh.

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  3. I fight this fight many a morning. They haven't yet started to rummage through the dirty laundry basket, thank gosh. I purposely don't wash their clothes very often, so they will be FORCED to wear a "non-favorite" just once! I think they are stashing things, though, as I always see the same pieces in rotation. What really kills me,however, is when I suggest passing down the "outcasts" to younger cousins. Suddenly the size 6x jeans and striped tunic become THE outfit...for about 1 day! Then the cycle starts over...

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  4. I had this fight with my son right up to the very day he moved to his father's house. (I'm moving in the spring and he wanted to try living with his dad before moving across country... not because of the clothes LOL) He wore the same three shirts regardless of the shorts or jeans or dress pants. It was maddening, infuriating, frustrating, and every other ing there is. They grow out of it soon enough, and girls usually before boys!

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  5. You are not alone! And it isn't just girls. My sons both have a few shirts and shorts they prefer to rotate through. I wouldn't care except for the money issue, like you said. You buy something and they say they like it and will wear it, then don't. I can't do the laundry thing because they do their own laundry. Hey, now there's a thought. Your daughter is definitely old enough to do her own laundry. You could make this her new chore and see how often she wants to do her own laundry.... :)

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  6. I have no kids of my own, but my plan is to employ the same strategy my parents used with my siblings and me. When you start wasting money by not wearing clothes your parents bought for you, you will begin purchasing clothes with your own money. For me, this was great and I worked my ass off over the summer to pay for school clothes because it meant that my mom had no say in my wardrobe beyond length of hems or necklines, but my siblings shut their mouths for many years after that edict.

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  7. Damn them for having opinions. Mine is exceedingly stubborn about clothes choices and I try hard not to fight every. single. battle. Hence, she was only person at bus stop without a jacket the other day. I keep waiting for those "natural consequences" to kick in, but so far, no good. Then again, my mother says I wouldn't let her buy panties for me at 3. And I remember when my tomboy self quit dresses cold turkey in 3rd grade, thus wasting an entire year's wardrobe that we could ill-afford. Turnaround's a bitch, but I sure loved the days when I could dress her in whatever I chose.

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  8. My son is only 3 years old and I hope he won't be stubborn.

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  9. Phew! I'm glad we have never had any clothing battles...plenty of other battles, but not over clothing. I love your creatativenss though....hiding them in the guest room. Good one!

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  10. I am sure that I will miss out on a lot of fun mother-daughter stuff because I have two boys and have no plans to have any more children, but when I read stories like this and remember what I was like in 6th grade I feel pretty happy that I am in a house full of boys who don't care about clothes. :)

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  11. Hehehe. My 4th grader has her usual rotation. Luckily, other 4th graders mostly do not care if you wear the same clothes over and over.

    Human sausage. HA!

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